This week, little Missy has her prom night.
I cannot quite believe my youngest has already finished high school!
For some parents, their kids’ passage from home to kindergarten, from kindergarten to elementary school, and then to high school are disturbing milestones. They were not for me. However, this one is. In Canada, children turn of age at 18. She will be 18 this summer. She finishes school in a couple of weeks, this tells me it is time for me to take a step back and leave her room to spread her wings.
This is the second time a child of mine who turns of age and letting go is not all that easy. I know many of you will think, “she is an overbearing mother who doesn’t have a life”. Well, I have good reasons to be overbearing; both kids have severe learning disabilities, one of them is special needs, and although one is more autonomous than the other, both still require support most young adults their age do not. Being a dotting mother for 20 years or so does not stop from one day to the next. I need to let them go just enough so they grow more autonomous and prevent them from major pitfalls.
It requires adjustments. I need to find the right balance. Always care and support without making the steps for them, reinforce their decisions making skills, teach them how to make good and wise decisions.
It is time for the mother to take a step back and for the woman to take a step forward; she has been neglected for a very long time. Being a mother has been my main role, the one that is still at the forefront of my mind and my heart.
I still bite my cheek from time to time… when I remember their chronological age and when I remind myself it is time for them to learn how to navigate the world and the many demands of daily life.